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A University Of Georgia Sophomore Explains How To Nab A Husband

July 11, 2012 by  
Filed under Choosing Lingerie

Amber Estes UGA

The Red and Black

Amber Estes

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University of Georgia sophomore Amber Estes wrote an insightful column for The Red and Black (UGA’s student newspaper) on how female college students can “attain the thing that is most essential in securing our futures.”

Nope, not a four-year degree, but a ring on your finger.

In her column, she breaks down the six steps to attracting the perfect frat-daddy husband, like choosing a prestigious university and staying classy —”a man won’t get down on one knee for a woman who is overly willing to get down on both of hers.”

And of course, she knows that the real way to a man’s heart is through social media:

Step 3: Instagram everything. The men will come up to you and flirt during your afternoons on campus, and soon you will be receiving an influx of friend requests. This step is crucial. These boys have only ever seen you in your I-look-good-but-I’m-not-trying attire; they have way higher standards for your going out pictures.

Nothing spruces up some mediocre pics like a lighting adjustment and filter on Instagram. Also, make sure you take pictures with your pretty friends, but not ones that are prettier than you. That way the boys know you don’t hang around with uggos, but it’s also crystal clear that you’re the queen of the pack.

We’re not sure if this is a real plea for an M.R.S. degree or a lame attempt at satire, and the commenters on The Red and Black‘s website clearly can’t tell either (we’re seriously hoping it’s satire, especially since her column from the previous week exhorts people in their 20s to “find themselves” after college). But it’s definitely a slap in the face to any girl actually going to college for an education.

Read Estes’s full column at The Red and Black

Now, read about the 10 biggest party schools of the past decade

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